The Secret to Developing Great Leaders

Why can some people produce great leaders and for others it’s like trying to find their way across a busy street blindfolded?

There is a secret to producing the next generation of leaders. But, first there a few obstacles that if they exist in your life, thought process or development style, you will hinder, retard or reject the next great leader. Actually, they will probably just leave you first. Great leaders have something in them that you have to draw out, sharpen and shape. Do you know what it is? Leadership. Either people will follow or they don’t. You can never be a true leader without people that follow you from the heart. If you can’t win the heart of the people you lead or are trying to develop, then you will face the continual frustration of what could have been or what might have been. Your leadership tree will bloom rarely and produce little to no fruit.

Unknown

“The price of greatness is responsibility“

~Winston Churchill 

You’ll never develop great leaders if…

…If you don’t give them real responsibility. Developing leaders absolutely need real responsibility. This means you have to release control of certain things into their hands. Real responsibility means they have the ability to fail. You aren’t leading if you don’t have the ability to fail. Now, as the overall leader in your organization, you are the safety net. But, get far enough away from the leader that he/she feels the air between their decision and the safety net. If you are constantly cutting off or jumping in to the decisions your developing leaders are making, you aren’t allowing them to learn by experience. Now, when do you cut them off or interrupt them? When they are making excuses. Responsibility means you will be held accountable for your actions. Responsibility means having the power and control to manage something and be held accountable for your actions. Too many coaches or teachers or instructors or bosses do not give their charges real power to influence real decisions. And then, they don’t really let them own the responsibility.

Responsibility = Release 

The secret to discovering your next great leader: responsibility. Who in your organization already is taking the most responsibility? Who is highly responsible right now without much prodding or pushing from you? This is a person to watch. People you are watching can be promoted too early, too soon and stifle and stop all future growth.

Leadership Secret: Give lots of responsibility before you give a promotion, title or raise. The best leaders like the responsibility more than the recognition. Responsibility before praise. Praise before promotion.

…If you are impatient and rush the development process. A great leader must have the attitude of a farmer. A farmer understands that in developing his crop that there are seasons and soils that affect the development and fruitfulness of the plant. A leader who can develop other leaders understands this too. If you are frustrated with your inability or your people’s inability, then chances are, you might not be that good at reading the seasons in your team members lives. As a leader who wants to develop other leaders, you only have the ability to water, prune and to observe the growth of the leader. You can’t make a leader grow. The developing leader is ultimately responsible for his/her own growth. But, you must nurture and cultivate–this is your responsibility. Neglect will kill your growing plants (people). For clarity, you cannot nurture that which doesn’t exist. Make sure you are working in reality–the leader must have the nature of a leader. You cannot make a nature, you can only nurture. 

Nature = Leader 

Nurture = Leadership Development 

The farmer is ultimately concerned with yield. Yield is the measure of the entire amount that will be produced. If you rush development, you will produce a deformed leader. The leader will be lacking the growth that only comes from time and seasons. Yield takes time. You must be patient with the immaturity of your plants. If you are patient, then you are more likely to see a strong healthy, mature and reproducing plant appear. Focus on the yield. Start small. Measure. Examine. Does this plant (person) have the ability to produce (results)? Stop promoting people who can’t get healthy results. Stop pushing people who can’t get results. Leaders have the natural ability to get results. Focus on your people getting better. When they get better, they will get better results. Growing your leaders will grow your yield. 

Yield = Results 

…if you don’t grow through reinventing yourself continuously. The farmer is concerned with the quality of the soil that the leader is planted in. If the leader is not examining the environment and climate that the one that is being developed in is healthy for growth, then a large part of the frustration may come because the soil has not been tilled correctly. Soil always need to be tilled. Now, get this, I’m about to mix my metaphor. You, the leader, are not only the farmer, you are also the soil. If your people aren’t growing, it’s ultimately because they choose not to grow or you aren’t growing. Most often, the leader has grown stagnant. Each generation of new leaders changes. If you want to develop people better, then you have to grow. You have to learn. Then, you have to share those learnings with those you are training. You must cultivate your own soil, before you cultivate the soil of those seeking to grow out of you. Leadership trees only grow branches that grow fruit and reproduce, if they are healthy. 

The Secret: Leadership Development must be viewed as a process, not a product. The process requires cultivating, planting, nurturing and pruning. The process is always on-going, fluid and dynamic. It’s a field plowed by fewer and fewer, but the harvest is well worth the work!

 

 

presented by

 IMG_1354

(c) Redwall, LLC. 2016.

Stop Worrying and Grow Some Wings

“Do not worry about tomorrow, tomorrow has enough worries of its own, sufficient for the day is its own trouble“

~Jesus 

Worry is your life’s thief. Worry provides no benefit to anything that you do. In fact, worry is not only a thief, it’s your jailer. Worry robs you, then locks you up and throws away the key. Worry has imprisoned you with the bars of your own construction in a prison of your own design–worry is also the architect.

IMG_4103

Aren’t you tired of being robbed? Aren’t you tired of being held captive in a prison of your own making? Aren’t you tired of shaking the bars of worry? Don’t you want to be free?

But, yet, worry still rules our lives. We feel like life has dealt us such a poor hand and difficult circumstances. It feels like everyone else is free to go about their business and be happy. When you worry you feel like you are not in control, but worry means you are exactly in control. But, the control is coming from your damaged flesh, your flawed view of the world and yourself, and the wrong view of God.

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength.”

~Corrie Ten Boom

In case no one told you, you have work to do. All worry does is sap you of the strength to accomplish some really great things in life. In case no one told you, the world needs you–your world needs you. But, not the you that wears the lenses of worry on all that you see. Worry is a burden you are not supposed to carry. Worry is a clouded lens that you are not supposed to look through. Worry is a chain you don’t have to wear. Worry is a bog you don’t have to step in.

IMG_4105

Tim Elmore said there are two kinds of people in life: settlers and pioneers. Settlers are those who move ahead only when they are safe. Settlers are worriers, controllers and self-absorbed. Pioneers are those who explore and pave the way for others. Pioneers are seekers, risk-takers and map-makers. Pioneers are the kind of people Christ calls to follow him. Those who are willing to risk it all. Forsake it all. Go for it all.

Worry is really about where you find your security. If your security is in your ability or the ability of human convention or construction , then your security will always be misplaced, resulting in debilitating doubt that produces worry. But, if your security is placed in God, then you are trusting in the ability of the Almighty, resulting in the ability to go into places where others would never dare.

Eagles soar, chickens roost. Eagles are fearless and free. Chickens are fearful and flighty. Pioneers are eagles. Settlers are chickens. Eagles go where chickens would never dare.

“But they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:31

Stop worrying and grow some wings. Waiting on God means you stop worrying and start trusting. If God wants to get you over something He’ll supply you with the wings to do it. If God wants to take you through something, he’ll give you the strength for your two legs to carry you through it. If God’s deliverance is to come from you out-running something, then you will sprint forward.

Worry makes you wobbly: But, first, those who learn to wait must learn to walk. As your faith grows, you grow. Have you ever watched an infant learn to walk? First, they crawl. Then, they learn to pull themselves up. Then, they stand. After, they learn how to stand still while attached to the earth spinning on its axis, then, they discover they can take a step. But, it’s not a confident step. It’s a wobbly step. Worry makes you take wobbly steps. Wobbly steps cause you to stumble. Stumbling causes you to fall. All worry does is create a bunch of uncertainty in your life, so that as you seek to take the next step, you are scared, timid and weak. With that approach of course you will take the wrong step.

Worry is the where your fears exploit your fragility: People can be fragile. You are physically fragile. Try jumping off a 40 foot roof and landing on solid ground. But, I am speaking more of spiritual and emotional fragility. People are fragile until God strengthens them. Stop thinking you are strong. Stop thinking you have the ability. Start trusting God by waiting on Him. He will strengthen you if you allow him, if you wait on him. You can’t outrun God nor get left behind by him. Worry is like a steroid for your fears. Give your fear a big dose of worry and watch those fears grow at an uncontrollable rate–this is why worry freezes, immobilizes and paralyzes you.

Worry makes you wish you were somewhere else: When you worry, you start thinking about escaping. You are not sure what you are escaping, but you want out, away and without delay. But, this is silly. You can’t escape worry, you have to kill it. Worry is a leach. And the Bible is clear about the leach. “The leech has two daughters: Give! [more] and Give! [more]” (Proverbs 30:15). All worry does is suck the life out of you and demands more and more of which you don’t have any more.

Worry warps your relationships: When worry dominates your thought process, you receive an unintentional filter about how you see the world and others in it. This is a warped view of reality. It’s like wearing a pair of glasses that have tinted lenses in a room where everyone else is wearing clear glasses or no glasses at all. You can’t understand why people don’t see it the way you do. It’s because they don’t see it the way you do! Your worry has warped your view of reality. You are seeing things that don’t exist. Stop blaming them and take your worry-Ray Bans off!

But, you say, “Hold on just a minute, I’m a cautious person and I’m accounting for all the possibilities.” WRONG. You are a worrier. A prudent person is different than a worrier. A prudent (caution born of wisdom) person receives their caution from a position of clarity, not a position of anxiety. A prudent person sees the possibilities of failure and success, not just all the probabilities of failure. The Bible is clear, “The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it” (Proverbs 22:3). The prudent person is saved from needless suffering. The worrier is subjected to needless suffering.

“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?“

~Luke 12:25

(c) Redwall, LLC. 2016.

How You Think Determines How You Decide

“You want to change your results, then change your decisions”

Dan T. Cathy

IMG_3639

Did you know that the average adult makes about 35,000 conscious decisions every day? And that’s just a regular day!  Now, step into leadership, management, ownership or parenthood and those decisions accelerate in both quantity and severity.

You’ve heard the definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results. Sadly, on a daily basis we spend a large part of our life and decision-making rehash the same decisions over and over again producing the same kinds of results.

Do you want to see, to experience and to produce different results? Then, you must start thinking differently. Because when you think different, you decide differently. And decisions are the doorways of behavior. 

You don’t need a new vision, a new plan or a new dream until you first have a new thought. What does a good mentor, counselor or coach do? Ultimately, they are stretching your minds to a point where you begin to think differently. When you think differently you begin to see things differently. Seeing things differently helps you decide differently—the place where you make your decisions.

The reality is that no one can see the future. For if we could, we wouldn’t have to think, we simply would just have to react. Good reactions stem from good mental discipline.

The Example of the High Speed Chase 

Think of it this way: a high speed car chase. Law enforcement most often gets the bad guy. Why? Law enforcement trains and is equipped for the eventually that a bad guy will get in a fast car and attempt to drive at high speeds away from law enforcement. The bad guy doesn’t train to elude police, but law enforcement trains to catch bad guys at high speeds. The bad guy is using thinking (albeit reckless and dangerous) that is reactionary. The good guys (yes, law enforcement #backtheblue) are responding based upon countless hours of training and teamwork. There is a difference between reacting and responding.

Reacting is your thoughtless, automatic movement to stimulus. Reactionary thinking is really careless thinking. It’s like impulse thinking. This is acting without planning. There are times when you need reactionary thinking, but almost everyone of them involves an immediate response to a dangerous situation. But, most people freeze in those situations. When you just react in your marriage, in your business or in your relationships, you are almost always at a disadvantage. It’s like trying to be a one-legged dancer. It just looks and feels awkward.

“The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it.” 

Proverbs 27:12

Responding is the calculated activity to a situation or circumstance. Responding the work of a prudent person. A prudent person is a wise person committed to thinking through, thinking around and thinking beyond a situation or circumstance.  To calculate requires thoughtful preparation and mental discipline. Two highly trained dancers working as a pair are a beautiful thing. The graceful lines, the calculated movements and the perfect positioning are all evidence of countless hours of preparation, discipline and training. They make it look easy and seamless, but it’s only because they are responding appropriately and timely.

“The future’s coming at us faster than we think“

Louie Giglio 

When the future comes fast, our responses born of our thoughts must be measured, disciplined and calculated.

Worthy of the Calling

Dan T. Cathy challenges leaders to get their thinking in alignment. When a vehicle is out of alignment two things happen: the rubber that meets the road gets warped & it begins to drift. When your thoughts are out of alignment this warped thinking leads to drifting. Drifting always leads to the ditch!

“New days require new thinking”

images-11

Each new day requires new thought. You don’t have a crystal ball and you are not Michael J. Fox in a Delorean time machine. You can’t change yesterday, but you can begin to think differently about today, which can lead to a different tomorrow.

  1. Think Differently. This means new thought. New thought often needs a new process. If you leave your thoughts like a river to flow where they will, then they will always take the path of least resistance. But it you want sharp thoughts, then you must grind your thoughts against truth, reality and a better tomorrow. If you want sharp thoughts, then you better find a grind stone. Who or what is sharpening your thoughts?
  2. Think Forward. The world is moving. The world is moving faster. It won’t stop for you. You can’t call a timeout or hit the pause button. If you don’t have a vision, then you don’t really know why you are going where you are going. A vision provides the reason to move. A goal sets the direction of how and when to move.
  3. Think Cool. This really means getting your thinking off yourself and on to others. The Apostle Paul said, “I become all things to all men, in order to reach some” (paraphrase, 1 Corinthians 9:22). Trends are simply movement. If you want to figure out why people are thinking the way they are, then you must understand them. You don’t have to love or live the trends to follow them.
  4. Think Shared Ownership. This is really a stewardship mindset. Your thoughts must land on personal responsibility. If your thoughts lead you to dismissive or dissociative behavior, you are thinking like a renter and not an owner. Ownership is one of the most powerful elements an organization, a relationship or a business can have in the thought processes of its people. When you take ownership of your marriage, you take responsibility for making it better. Owners want profit. The question is how profitable are your thoughts? Are they paying dividends or dead-ends? 

Your thoughts only matter if your results matter. Better results flow from better thinking. Test your thoughts against trusted sources and trust people. This is where good thoughts become great.

“…whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.“

Philippians 4:8 

You are Not Going to Miss Out–Keep Dreaming

“God puts us in the right place.

God puts us in the right place–all the time.”

~Louie Giglio 

IMG_3585

It doesn’t always feel like this. It doesn’t always makes sense what God is doing. The future is often clouded and unclear, blocked by the pain or uncertainty of our present circumstances. It’s hard to believe in a more positive future, when our present and past are filled with buckets of negativity. Our dreams have been shattered by our pain, our past and our poverty.

God chooses people. It must be one of his favorite things to do. To take men and women in each generation and manifest a part of his universal, cosmic plan through a little piece of dust and clay on planet earth.

God loves to choose seemingly insignificant people. Consider one insignificant boy. His name is Joseph. We find him in Genesis (Chapter 37). God gave Joseph a dream. He didn’t understand it really, not fully. But, what he did understand is that it was from God. Joseph’s dream elevated not only his mind, but his heart as well. When God gives you a dream, your mind and your heart will soar to the heights of heaven. This is the power of a dream: it elevates you to a higher place. 

You will never see your dream fulfilled if you don’t grow. Dreams are lofty. Basically, dreams are up and you are down. The only way to get up there where the dream is a reality is to climb. There is no elevator, no escalator, no jetpack and no magic carpets that get you up to the dream quickly.

My friend, Cliff Robinson says, “A dream is a picture of over there.” Seriously, you have to grow. If you want to get “over there,” then, growth is not an option. But, growth is most often painful. Growth means you must leave where you are–where you are comfortable, unconcerned and cautious. You won’t know you’ve grown if you don’t measure yourself. Growth is not about how you feel, but how well you deal with your adversity, your trials and your challenges.

Dreams, like children, must be birthed to come to life. They come full of pain and adversity. They must be nurtured, fed, trained and disciplined in order to reach maturity.

An idea is not a dream. An idea is a thought on a treadmill–it is constantly moving, better never getting anywhere. Your ideas that don’t get out of your head are nothing more than wishes born in fantasy. They live in the shadows of your mind.

Dreams are born in mystery. They live to be illuminated.

Dreams take time. Joseph wasn’t ready for his dream to be fulfilled. He had to get to the place where the reality of his dream met the reality of his circumstances–this is called growth. And growth always requires waiting. The worst thing you can do is rush a dream. Joseph rushed to tell his brothers his dream. Most people can’t handle your dream, but God can. If your dream is a lofty dream, I mean like way up there or out there where only God can make it possible, then often you need to only commit God at first.

I believe, this is where Joseph messed up. I believe in his impetuousness, his rashness and his immaturity; he couldn’t wait to tell his family of the grandeur, they mystery of his dream. The problem was that the implications of his dream toward his family were perceived as either negative, impossible or at least highly unfavorable to his 10 older brothers. Be careful to talk about your dream with others. Sometimes dreams start as sacred. If your dream inspires awe, then you should approach it reverence.

The Bible is clear, “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you” (Matthew 7:6, ESV). This is exactly what Joseph did. He ran off and cast what was sacred (holy) to his brothers. All it did was to provoke them to jealousy and anger. Their anger caused these unrestrained men to “trample” his dreams underfoot and to “turn and attack” him. After they sold Joseph as a slave, they, literally, tore the symbol of anger, the robe of many colors into “pieces” and gave it to their father.

Dreams are refined by adversity. Don’t despise adversity. God does some of his best work in the lives of his people in the toughest of times. Champions are refined by adversity.

“Champions aren’t made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them-a desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have the skill, and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill.“

~Muhammad Ali 

Most dreams are high enough, they just aren’t deep enough. If God puts the dream in your mind, it will always sink down into your heart. It becomes sacred, holy and untouchable. The dream is like a weight. It bares on your soul and bores into your heart. The world can’t touch it or crush it. You begin to live with new conviction. New conviction will give way to new construction. Conviction is simply the will’s confidence. When your will is unshakeable, unyielding and resilient, you will take a pounding and keep on rebounding.

However,  if the dream comes from another source and somehow makes it to your heart, it is corrosive, corrupting and constrictive. Your work will increase, your thoughts escalate, but your conviction will fade.

Don’t be afraid to dream, if God is blessing the dream. Adversity is often a great blessing. If God has chosen you, then God can choose to make all things work together for the good of those called according to his purpose in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:28). Because, those he called, he foreknew (8:29). More good news, God chose you. God is not like us. He will choose you every time.

You may feel like you dream has died. That’s okay, God is in the resurrecting business. If God kills your dream, He can bring it back to life bigger, better and stronger to last longer. You are not alone. Give your dreams to God. Give your adversity to God. Give your desert to God–He’s good at making streams run in dry places.

“Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the wilderness
and streams in the wasteland“

Isaiah 43:18-19

(c) Redwall Leadership Academy, 2016.

Parents, Your Kids Need More Sleep

“Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” 

~Benjamin Franklin

IMG_3540

Hey, Parents, your kids need more sleep.

According to a recent survey, children these days are averaging over an hour less of sleep a night than 30 years ago. This is creating a wealth of problems not a healthy child.

The notion that your kids will “catch up” on sleep this weekend is a foolish notion that makes little sense and even less of a healthy child. When you “catch up” on sleep you are creating an abnormal sleep cycle. An abnormal sleep cycle messes with the innate physiological clock that exists in every person. Children need this clock to function as normally, as scheduled as possible. Catching-up on sleep is like winding your clock forward, then backwards, then forward, then the alarm going off, then backwards again…it’s a terrible cycle for a clock, even more for a child.

Bottom line: Children need consistent, scheduled sleep.

Why?

They are growing. Growing children need enough sleep each night to assist their body in maintaining peak health. They are growing physiologically, mentally and emotionally. The National Sleep Foundation says that children ages 6 to 13 need an average of 9 to 11 hours of sleep every evening. I once had a child I was coaching in basketball brag to me how he stayed up all night playing video games. We were about to play a game, and I said, “I know you think  I’ll be impressed that you haven’t gone to sleep all night, but I’m not.” Of course, he played even extra worse than he normally did. Sleep deprivation makes children cranky, uncoordinated, sluggish, un-alert and not mentally sharp.

Your body is not designed to function without sleep. Sleep deprivation is a torture technique! If you are an adult and need your rest, how much more do you children need it?

I am often appalled at what I hear about bedtimes of children. Maybe, no one has told you, but your children need more sleep and less video games. Video games, iPads and tv’s aren’t your children’s parents. Completing the next level doesn’t denote bedtime–you the parent do.You, the living and breathing adult, are the parent. It is your responsibility to train your child. A properly trained child is a properly prepared child. A home where training is haphazard, lackadaisical and arbitrary is an un-disciplined and disordered home. Your children need structure, order, discipline, nutritious food and sleep. Parental neglect is at an all-time high. We need to reverse this cycle and return parental engagement to its rightful place! 

A proper ending to one day is instrumental in a proper beginning for the next day.

 

Don’t use this excuse: “Mom and Dad, but I’m just not tired.” Children think they aren’t tired and you believe them and you both are wrong!  This happens more frequently now because we are allowing our children to be stimulated differently. Now, their brains have been overstimulated by digital distraction creating a catatonic euphoria. This digital distraction creates an overstimulation in the mind that betrays the physiological need for the body to rest. The body doesn’t get the rest it needs and this affects the next day and the day after that (ever experienced jet-lag?). This is like jet-lag for kids without the expensive plane ticket.

Your child needs physical stimulation more than digital stimulation. I am not against video games (as a hobby, not a lifestyle). But, prolonged digital activity does not promote a healthy lifestyle. Spending all afternoon and evening playing video games does not expend the energy your child needs to burn in order to help him/her get a good night’s rest.

Don’t use this excuse: “My child doesn’t require as much sleep.” Normally, this is a cover-up or just blind ignorance by the parent. Children are all made the same way, all have the same growth cycle and all grow generally in the same way. Your child is not an exception. This excuse probably means that your child can’t calm him/herself down to sleep. The primary culprit: anxiety. Children are facing more pressure and experiencing more anxiety than previous generations. Children’s exposure to horror movies and video games, pornography, violence, bloodshed, sexually provocative scenes, anger and massive swings of adrenaline are all keeping your kids awake at night. Add in the pressures of mean kids at school, homework and extra-circular activities, your children are exposed more today than ever before.

images-6

Hints at Helping Your Child Sleep Better:

–Parents must act as their child’s guardian angel. This means, parents put your children to bed until they leave your house. Make bed-time a special ritual in your home. Don’t rush it, yell or totally disregard it. Make bed-time a treasure-time. It will be magic for you and your kids (and really your grandkids one day too). Make bed-time a safe time. The more secure your child feels, the better they will sleep.

3 S’s of Bedtime: 

  1. Structured. Routines are good for kids. Structure demonstrates priorities. Make your child’s sleep a priority. The structure is also teaching your children responsibility and stewardship. When children know what’s expected of them, then they can be held accountable. Structure is good for growing children. Bedtime is no exception. Bedtime needs to be a structured time.  
  2. Safe. Children that feel safe sleep more soundly and securely. Your children need to feel safe and be safe at bed time. Make sure you address any fears your child has. Fix their room so they feel physically safe. Don’t tell ghost stories or talk about scary stuff before bed time. Bedtime needs to be a safe time. 
  3. Special. Connect with your children at bedtime. They are not sheep to put in a pen at bedtime. They are your God-given offspring who will one day be putting your grandkids to bed. Make bedtime a magical, special time. If you rush bedtime you are disconnecting with your children. Bedtime doesn’t need to last forever, but make it special. Do special things that your children will remember for a lifetime. Bedtime needs to be a special time.

–Read a bedtime story and a Bible story to your kids at bed time. Reading relaxes the mind. Even better, when the reading stretches the mind toward heaven or towards some far away distant land or distant time. Children often dream of the last things they hear or see–make them positive images or thoughts.

–If you have given your kids electronic devices, don’t allow them in their rooms at night. Make your kids “check” them in with you at bed time. Your kids don’t need electronics at or after bed time.

–Wind them down, don’t stir them up. Don’t give your kids too many extra charges of adrenaline at bed-time. It makes it harder for them to go to sleep. I am terrible at this. I love stirring my kids up, then when I’ve had enough, I try to make them go to sleep. This formula never works well!

–Teach them how to pray beyond “Now I Lay Me”. Teaching your child to prayer is the most effective way to teach them how to overcome nightmares and bad dreams. Teach your child that they can wake up in the middle of the night and God will still hear their prayers. This is an effective way to help a child go back to sleep. Prayer is an extremely good promoter of sleep.

–Actually, pray with them at bed time. Get on your knees beside your child’s bed and pray with them. This helps the security of your child’s mind and spirit rest easier. Children trust in God until you or the world teach them not to.  You want to leave a powerful image in your children’s mind as they grow up: kneel with them at bed time.

–Give your child a big hug and kiss at bed time. Your children need healthy affection. Your hug and kiss gives your child needed healthy affection. It is instilling a deep value in your child: your love. A hug and kiss communicates to a child’s heart that you love and value them–that they are accepted.

–If you discipline your child at bedtime, then make up with them before they go to sleep. Don’t let your child wonder, “Do Mommy and Daddy still love me?” It is your job as a parent to restore and “right” the relationship with your child. A right relationship with your children help them sleep better.

-Don’t fight at night in front of your children. When you yell and scream and throw and break things or worse, your children will not sleep well. Learn how to communicate or go to counseling, but all your anger is damaging your children.

–Create a peaceful, ordered home. Children will drop from exhaustion anywhere, but they will go sleep better if their home is ordered. An ordered environment promotes peace. When things are dirty, cluttered and messy a child gets use to it, but it’s not actually helping the child to sleep. I have found that disordered homes often have disordered sleep. Sleep works best on a schedule. A schedule requires order.

IMG_3539

A good night’s sleep does a world of good. It will do your child a world of good. And your child might just do more good in the world! Promote peace. Promote sleep for your child. Make your child’s sleep a priority.

“In peace I will both lie down and sleep, For You alone, O LORD, make me to dwell in safety.” Psalm 4:8

(c) Redwall, LLC. 2016

Want to be Great?

You don’t have to be great to do great things.

A massive misconception exists in our world today that you have to already be great in order to accomplish great things. I have good news for you, this, simply, is not true.

Many people want to be great. They want to get great recognition, great wealth, a great mate, a great job, a great house, great kids, a great vacation and a great paycheck. There is a yearning deep within every man and woman on the planet for greatness. Something stirs within each person when they hear stories of those who did or accomplished great things–they yearn for more.

Greatness is truly defined not by when you arrive, but when you depart. Greatness is wrongly viewed as the celebrity getting off the plane to a crowd of admirers and paparazzi. True greatness is leaving your comfort to reach and touch those in discomfort. Comfort is not an indicator of greatness. 

But, do you really need recognition from others to live in greatness? Do you really need a plaque, a monument or memoirs to live as a great? Do you need to have lived centuries in the past to be considered great? 

No. You can start being great today. Yes, like right after you are done reading this or sharing it or whatever you will do.

How? 

Greatness is the quality of being above normal, above average; achieving excellence. 

You don’t ever have to be recognized to live in greatness. Why?

So, just start getting above what is normal for you. If it is normal not to help others, start helping others. If it is normal to not think about others, start thinking about others. If it is normal to be highly self-centered, get over yourself.

See, living in greatness is about seeing value in others.

Why?

Because you have value. Every person has tremendous value. This value gives you worth. Most people don’t realize they are inherently valuable. When you solve your own self-worth question, you can begin helping others solve theirs.

Greatness is not a measurement; it is a way of living. Don’t live life like you are on top of the mountain and everyone else is below you, but a few others you admire are up there with you. This is arrogance. You want to be great, then treat others like they are on top of the mountain and you are just here to serve them. You want to be great, spend your life encouraging, up-lifting, praising and blessing others–even if they don’t, especially if they don’t deserve it. Jesus said, “…But whoever would be great among you must be your servant.” (Matthew 20:26). The word “great” in Greek is the word ‘megas’ and it’s where we get our word mega–like megaton, megabyte, megalomanic, megahertz and megawatt. Mega means exceedingly superior in all ways like in weight or scale. Be mega in actions towards others, but not mega in your thoughts toward yourself–this makes you a megalomaniac!

Greatness is not how you see yourself; it is how you see others. Really, it’s where you see yourself and where you see others. You start viewing others as more important and more in need of priority. When you begin to give priority and preference to others, you are doing a great thing. This principal follows the golden rule of “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” The golden rule is really not that hard, unless, you are full of yourself, arrogant, self-indulgent and full of pride. Then, you see greatness as being served, and not serving. Jesus, the King of kings, said, “even the Son of Man (Me) came to serve and not to be served” (Mark 10:45).

Greatness is not what you get recognized for, but how you recognize others. What’s really fun in life is when you are free to recognize the little things that others do. I mean, why is it so hard to thank the server at the restaurant? Why it so hard to repay ugliness with kindness? Why is it so hard to give people a second chance? Why is it so hard to give others all the credit? Because, we want the recognition. We want to be viewed by others as significant. The way to

Greatness is not what you get, but about what you give. If we really look behind the masks and false-fronts of the lives of our rich and famous, then what we will see is greed–pure unadulterated greed. The unquenchable thirst for more and more. The paradigm for truly great people is discovered through their incredible generosity. It is so much more fulfilling in life, when you feel incredible freedom when you give things away. It means your heart is not held captive by your craving for more. Maybe, you don’t have a lot of money to give. I’m simply saying, start being generous with what you have: your words, your time, your hobbies, your prayers and then examine your resources. Here’s a really crazy idea: be crazy generous with your kindness. 

IMG_3490

“A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees.”

-Amelia Earhart

The world is a harsh place. So many people working to be known as great and to know someone great. If they can’t know them, then they start working to know all about them as if the association will somehow rub off on them and make them kind of great. This is silly. Start bringing great kindness, great compassion, a great yearning to understand, great devotion and great recognition of others. 

Want to be great?

Don’t even consider it an option and just work at getting really good at making people feel really good about themselves. At the end of your life—it will have been a great one! 

IMG_1354

(c) 2016, Redwall Leadership Academy.

 

Why Leaders Must Learn to Follow

IMG_1354

“History’s worst leaders never learned to follow. As a result, they became tyrants, making the lives of their own followers miserable.”

~Michael Hyatt~

Chances are if you are reading this, you have an interest in leadership or see yourself as a leader. The real question is “do others view you as a leader?” You are not a leader unless you have followers. You may think of yourself as the world’s greatest leader…just no one has recognized you yet. Chances are you spend too much time in your own mind and not listening to the thoughts of others. Stop focusing on being a great leader and instead, focus and practice being a great follower.

Great leaders learn, first, by being great followers. Michael Hyatt believes that some of the world’s worst leaders never learned to follow. Simply, they thought extremely highly of themselves and they were able to grasp power and control and feel like a leader. Power does not signify a great leader. In fact, power often exposes a leader for how terrible, ineffective and immature he/she is. What restrains power? Humility.

1. Great followers practice great humility. 

History’s greatest leaders have all had great humility. Great humility is learned by, first, learning to follow. For any of you reading this that have journeyed through life for any length of time will know what I am about to say to be true: there are only two paths to deal with humility and both require pain. The first one is to get humbled. This is extremely painful. The Bible is clear, “pride goes before a fall” (Proverbs 16:18). The second is to chose humility. This too involves pain, but far less than if someone else humbles you. I have learned it is far better to lower yourself, than to get knocked off your feet!

Humility is critical to great leaders, because without it, the leader will ignore the counsel of others, insulate him/herself with voices that only speak what they perceive the leader wants to hear and isolate themselves from truth.

Following can be hard, especially, for the leader that in his/her heart sees errors and mistakes of the leader and worse, has to deal with the consequences of poor decisions. One of the best ways to develop your own leadership is to serve under a leader who does things wrong or poorly. This teaches you discomfort. It is good for a leader to stay uncomfortable. Discomfort often creates a heightened state of alertness.

The opposite of humility is pride.

2. Great followers live in a truth-filled reality. 

Don’t construct an alternate universe because you don’t agree with the one you are currently living in or the role or position you currently have. Reality is the state things truly exist in. To many wanna-be leaders live in the fantasies of their own minds, constructing alternate realities that they try to impose on others. Here’s the problem: your alternate reality looks abnormal to those around you. You are not as great as you think you are.

reality = truth

alternate reality = deception 

Alternate reality is constructed because of pride. Pride unchecked becomes arrogance. Arrogance leads to destruction. Some leaders will fall from lofty heights never to recover and be useful as a leader. Followers learn to climb slowly, carefully and with patience test the truth of each new step. Poor leaders rush to judgment, rush to decision and rush through their growth curves, whereby, enhancing their own ability to be deceived.

Learn to follow. Enjoy being a follower. Enjoy making your leader look good. Followers have the freedom to not worry about who gets the credit. Arrogant leaders are immature leaders. Immature leaders are concerned with who gets the credit or the blame. Great followers accept the blame and share the credit. The ability of follower to do this shows they have crossed one of the largest obstacles to becoming a great leader: self.

The opposite of reality is deception. 

3. Great followers practice perpetual loyalty. 

Loyalty is locked-in faithfulness. People today know how to lock-in, but, increasingly, they don’t know what it means to be faithful.

images-5

One of my favorite stories that demonstrate faithfulness is the story of Hachi (or Hachiko) the golden-brown Akita breed of dog. Hachi would accompany his owner, a university professor to the train station each morning. In the afternoon, Hachi would arrive precisely at the time the train would arrive to accompany his master home. One day, Hachi’s owner died of a brain hemorrhage, unknowing his master died, Hachi showed up at the train station. Hachi would show up for 9 more years every day at the train station to await his master’s return. Hachi was more than committed. He was loyal. Hachi was locked-in every day for 9 years until he passed away. We don’t have humans that can stay faithful for 9 hours, much less 9 years.

To lead well you must have great loyalty. Loyalty means even if you disagree you don’t gossip, slander or criticize your leader. Followers must learn to accept the things they cannot change and stay faithful. Followers must stay locked-in to the target, no matter the variables, the obstacles or the adversity.

The opposite of loyalty is infidelity (unfaithfulness). 

4. Great followers don’t sacrifice personal integrity.

Great followers that become great leaders never sacrifice their integrity for gain, profit or success. In fact, they learn to value their integrity as an absolute in their character. As the climate of greed accelerates in our world followers must learn to stand firm and strong in regards to integrity. Cheating, lying and stealing must be things that the follower learning to lead never practices. Cutting corners, taking short cuts or just avoiding issues is not the path of integrity. Integrity is moral worth. Your integrity and your character are one in the same. Integrity is the culmination of your honesty, truthfulness and moral fiber. Sadly, too many leaders are corrupt and practice little to no integrity whatsoever. These kind of leaders are warped and great leaders always have a public honesty that is superseded by a private, personal integrity. Don’t sacrifice your integrity for personal gain for by doing so you are sacrificing your moral composition. Moral compromise is the doorway to destruction.

Leaders must learn to be good followers first. This is done through the lessons of humility, reality, loyalty and integrity. 

Look around. Who are you following? Who’s following you? 

To be a great leader, you need great followers.

(c) Redwall, LLC. 2016.

How to Prepare Your Kids for the Future

“We may not be able to prepare the future for our children, but we can at least prepare our children for the future“

~ Franklin D. Roosevelt~

Your kids are a facing a world more difficult than the one you grew up in. If you are a grandparent, then your grandkids are facing a world 1o times more difficult than you did. It’s hard to predict or project what might occur tomorrow, much less in a decade or two from now. But, don’t worry, you don’t need a glimpse into the future in order to prepare you kids today. Preparation can be difficult work. But, preparation today makes for prosperity tomorrow.

What can I do today to prepare my children for tomorrow? 

1 – Model hard work. You are responsible for the work ethic that your child will grow up with. Work ethic is not an inherited or endowed trait. No, work ethic is most often a modeled behavior. When children see their parents or parent working hard, it instills in the child an invisible imprint of what hard work is supposed to work like. I have interviewed countless young men and women who have stated that their single parent, almost always a mother, was their model of a good hard work. Children need to see their parents work hard, but parents also need to engage the child to join in the work. I am not talking about abusing your children with impossible adult tasks, but rather, the enlistment of your child to join a task and fulfill it unto completion. Invite your child to start a project with you–something that requires patience, perseverance and discipline to finish. 

2 – Finish what your start & start something worth finishing. This is called follow-through or better yet, commitment. Because parents are highly committed people these days, a climate in our homes of casual commitment is now the norm. This is where parents are massively slipping in today’s “what’s in it for me culture.” Make your children work a commitment through completion. Starting what you finish teaches the child to select things that they will ultimately have to be held accountable for. Children need to have real responsibility. Responsibility needs to grow with your child. Give them chores. Give them responsibilities around the house. Parents, stop modeling early-exits, half-way jobs and lackadaisical labor.

3- Teach them critical thinking, not criticism. Now, I didn’t say, teach them to be critical. We have enough critical and mean-spirited people in the world. In fact, it doesn’t take much to make people into critics and complainers. But, a critical thinker is one who learns to mentally examine something beyond the first reaction. Critical thinkers learn to think for themselves. They can construct reasonable arguments and demolish fallacies. The world does not need more puppets and pawns. Our world needs boys and girls who grow up into men and women who have the ability to analyze things for themselves and make an informed decision. Teach your children to think circumspectly about circumstances, situations and adversity.

4-  Teach your kids to do their homework. Kids hate homework. Parents hate when kids bring homework home! It becomes parent punishment. Doing their homework is not an option and should almost always be done before anything else–no video games, internet or social media until their work is done. This teaches your children that you are not to show up to a meeting, an assignment or a project unprepared as an adult. This lesson will come up later in life, when your child, now an adult, will need to understand that successful people put forth effort outside of their place of work. But, this is more than just about “work” this is about putting for the effort to investigate what they are doing. Doing your homework teaches your child to be the most prepared person in the room as an adult. Preparation is a significant key to success. 

5 – Read the Bible and other good books. My mother always said, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers!” I would add that “readers are often the over-achievers!” Reading someone else’s thoughts have the power to mold, filter and sharpen your own thoughts. Reading the Bible and other quality books have a way to help us calibrate our minds.

Do you want your child to be well-rounded? Then model and instruct them to read. Start with the Bible. The Bible has been God’s instruction manual for over 5,000 years. It has served every generation that has trusted it’s words and applied them to their leadership and lifestyles with some of the most remarkable results the ever has ever heard. The Bible is the Great Book. There is none other like it, nor will there ever be. Abraham Lincoln knew the greatness of the Bible,

“In regard to this Great Book, I have to say it is the best gift God has given to man. All the good the Savior gave to the world was communicated through this book. But for it, we could not know right from wrong. All things most desirable for man’s welfare here and hereafter are to be found and portrayed in it.”

Abraham Lincoln was right that “all things most desirable for man’s welfare” are contained in the pages of the Bible. Parents, do not neglect to read and teach your children the Bible. Begin with the Bible stories. Learn to love together the Bible with your children. Don’t assume they will discover the awesomeness of the Bible on their own. The world is against your child reading the Bible. If it’s not important to you, then why would you expect it to be important to them.

6. Teach your children to face adversity, not flee from it. Basically, teach your kids to be courageous. We have more cowards in the world than we need. We need our boys and girls to be courageous as children and grow into courageous adults. Teach your kids to be brave. Instill bravery into your kids, not recklessness. Courage counts the cost and moves forward with responsibility. Recklessness counts nothing and crashes forward with irresponsibility. The way to deal with adversity is to work through it, not walk around it. Walking around it is a form of denial and will produce greater problems in the future.

7. Teach your children to be good stewards, not good spenders. Stewardship is another word for management. Good stewards understand that their management leads to maximization.  Children need to learn to maximize what they have. This comes from a heart that is appreciative what has been received. Sadly, too many parents are terrible stewards, racking up credit card debit to satisfy their desire to keep up with everyone else (good at spending, bad at stewarding). Let me give parents a clue...everyone else is in debt too! (not everyone of course). Being a good steward/manager means learning to live at your means. Live with what God has provided. Stop trying to be like the people with the house on the hill, because those people are trying to be like the people on the next hill. Good stewards although ambitious, learn the secret of contentment. Teach your children to be satisfied and thankful of what they do have, not what they don’t have. Stewards are savers not spenders. Stewards are investors not gamblers.

The world grows more difficult. Prepare your children now for what they will face later. Your children are a blessing not a burden. How are you treating them?

“Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”

Deuteronomy 4:9

(c) Redwall, LLC. 2016

You Can Make a Difference

I have seen that even a few can make a difference.

You don’t need an army, a troop or a squad to make a difference in the world. You don’t need an organization an institution or legislation to make a difference. You don’t need skills, money or resources to make a significant impact. You don’t need the right social standing, bank account or organizational position to make a difference. You don’t need the right background, pedigree or degree to make a difference.

Little ‘ole common, ordinary and unremarkable you can make a difference. Single, seemingly insignificant people, have been transforming the world one step, one word and one day at a time.

Irena-Sendler

Irena Sendler was one such common person who acted with uncommon conviction she made a difference and changed her world. Irena lived during World War II in Poland. After the Nazis invaded her country and began rounding Jews and confining them to the ghettos, she took bold steps to make a difference. Posing as a sanitary inspector for the ghettos, she smuggled over 2,500 Jewish children out of the ghettos and placed them with sympathetic Polish families. Her actions landed her with the Gestapo to be tortured, abused and crippled, but she didn’t divulge any of the families or children. Irena chose to act on her convictions. She made a difference. It seems impossible for 1 = 2,500, but it wasn’t.

Don’t buy the lie, that you have to “be somebody to get something done.” You, starting where you are, can make a difference in the world one life, one moment, one interaction and one relationship at a time. But you must believe what seems, looks and feels impossible could be possible. 

The world is filled with problems. Smart people, rich people, powerful people and popular people offer solutions. Are these people really making a difference? The world seems to be getting worse, not better? Something just doesn’t add up? Who can make a difference? 

Difference is a mathematical term describing the remainder of a subtraction problem.

People who will whole-heartedly trust God and follow Jesus Christ by faith can and will make an eternal difference on this earth. God’s math from the throne of heaven does not compute the same way it computes on earth. Instead of needing a superior number on top and the inferior on the bottom to get a positive outcome, God places the inferior number on top and still gets a superior number as a result—we see this over and over again in the stories of the Bible and among those who are still following God to this day.

The natural world cannot compute faith. Faith is an intangible multiplier that causes great consternation to the logic and order of the world. But, this should not sound so unreasonable, because if you make the rules you, then according to your prerogative you can also make exceptions to the rules. Since God made the rules, His exceptions are those of faith.

When Peter walked on water, it was uncommon faith. When Noah built an ark for 100 years, it was exceptional faith. When Rahab hid the spies, it was remarkeable faith. When Abraham followed God with no direction but “go,” it was amazing faith. When Joseph stayed committed despite being abandoned, enslaved and imprisoned in Egypt, it was exceptional faith. Every act of faith that God blesses is an exceptional act of faith. There are no insignificant numbers, just as there is no insignificant faith. The Christian must never discount exceptional faith. For faith is always God’s exception to earth’s equations.

Faith is a conundrum to the world’s system of accounting. The world has been ordered by Christ. The world is held in place by Christ. Faith is his allowable exception to his rule.

How did 5 loaves of bread and 2 fishes feed 5,000 (Matthew 14:13-21)? How did 300 of Gideon’s army defeat 135,000 Midianites (Judges 7)? How did one Man die for the sins of all (2 Corinthians 15:5)? I could go on and on spanning at least 5 or 6 millennia of human history…

Simply put, the math does not add up. The world’s solution is to discount the story. Logic and reason scream “impossible!”  God’s answer is to multiply the x-factor—faith. When faith, genuine and unperverted enters the equations and problems of life, God’s math multiplies an outcome that previously looked, seemed and felt impossible. The Bible is clear that “nothing is impossible with God” (Luke 1:37).

Convictions are where courage collides with faith. The world needs men and women of deep conviction. Convictions establish the formula of faith as a constant in the life of one who will continue to seek God despite adversity, conflict or trial. If you are going to make a difference, then you will be a man or woman of conviction.

You want to make a difference? Exercise faith. Move forward in faith, ask by faith, stand by faith, love by faith, live by faith, rest in faith and work by faith. In order for this math to actually compute, the object of the faith must be Jesus Christ, not simply the faith itself. The faith must be applied to Jesus Christ because “in Him all the fullness” of God dwells in human form (Colossians 1:19).

Are you a difference-maker? You don’t have to be popular, powerful or polished. You don’t have to be a performer, politician or pundit.  You simply have to take one-step of faith at a time. Stop trying to run the whole journey in a day.

The difference you make is in the God you trust.

“for we walk by faith, not by sight“

2 Corinthians 5:7 

Leaders Must Have Passion

IMG_1354

Leaders that lack passion will soon be pulled in opposing directions. 

Leaders that lack a passion for their vision or their goals will be torn apart as their organization moves forward. There are always going be distractions, competing interests and adversity that the leader must recognize and respond appropriately to.

What is Passion? 

Passion is a sincere energy and a contagious enthusiasm.

If someone can catch your energy then you have contagious enthusiasm. It is often called charisma. Leaders have to have some of “it”. This is often the “it” that is undefinable, but totally followable by others. Leaders that lack this will simply be filling a position. They will not have the power to motivate those around them. Subsequently, when a leader lacks the power to motivate, he/she will resort to manipulation.

Leaders are masters of motivation and never resort to manipulation. 

Manipulation is the twisting of another for your personal achievement. Deception and flattery are the twin arms of manipulation. Beware of people who falsely praise you (flatter). Beware of people who twist things (deception). Leaders operate in the light. The light is transparency.

Motivation is the ability to inspire others. Passionate leaders have the ability to inspire others, where place-holder position people (poor leaders) resort to coercion, manipulation and extortion. Inspiration and motivation move people from the heart. The ability to motivate and inspire people results in the growing of the leader’s influence.

Leaders aren’t motivated by praise, they are motivated by passion. 

It is impossible for a leader to positively influence others if they do not have at least a baseline level of self-motivation. Leaders do not wait for the applause or praise of others to move forward. They don’t need the crowd’s approval. Passion is built from conviction. Conviction will stand when others sit and sit when all others stand. Conviction is born of belief.

Leaders move forward with conviction, not the crowd.

Leaders don’t test which way the wind is blowing to make a decision. These type of leaders are not leaders, but position fillers who are more concerned with themselves than the mission of the organization or others. Leaders who live by the crowd will also die by the crowd. Leaders must have conviction that stems from their heart and translates the thoughts in their head. If you are all head an no heart, then you will be swayed into a position that you may not be comfortable.

Leaders are courageous, not cowardly. 

Leaders face their fears and move forward. Place-holders, who think they are leaders because of their position, see shadows and retreat or run away. Courage is required by all effective leaders. Courage is strength on display. Cowards capitulate and surrender to fear. Leaders are willing to take the first step all the way until the last step.

“You can never cross the ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.“

Christopher Columbus

Leaders full of passion will take more ground, inspire more people and cross oceans to reach lands where dreams do come true.

Go live your dream. Inspire Others.

Pursue it with Passion.

Unknown-3

Property of Redwall Leadership Academy. 

All material is (c) 2016, Redwall, LLC.