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Too many people are living stuck lives. It’s time to transfer your trust to a source that’s unlimited and turn your frustrations into expectations.
Maybe you are stuck and not moving forward in your marriage, your job or a relationship. Maybe you are burdened, worn out and feel like you are not making any progress. This mesasage is for you.
The Danger of Being Stuck
(Get out your faith)
Luke 7:1-10
“Leaders are readers and readers are leaders”
This is an expression that my mother, who raised six successful children, would often proclaim. My mother wanted us to read the Bible and then any other good book that we could learn from. But, she wasn’t picky, fiction or non-fiction, she just wanted us to read. Our television watching and video game playing was limited and this gave us the “opportunity” to read. One of the reasons that I write to this day is because my writing is an extension of my reading. Reading is where your thoughts collide with the thoughts of another. Reading is mental exercise. Too many leaders today have grown thought-obese, because of too little mental exercise.
This collision of thought is healthy for anyone, but especially for leaders. Because the world moves at a much faster pace these days and information comes at light speed, leaders must set time aside to engage their mind and their thoughts in a healthy, contemplative manner. Reading (and writing for me) accomplishes this. Reading is healthy, mental exercise.
If you want to make better decisions, think better thoughts. If you want to think better thoughts, read better books. For me, I have not found a better book than the Bible to read.
Reading is where the collision of thought happens. A collision without a conclusion does little good. So the will must get involved. The will must form the thoughts into actionable behavior. Storing up information does a leader no good. A leader must read for understanding and application. If application is not the goal of the leader, then the leader will always play a supportive or frustrated role which will summarily yield little in the way of results and influence or simply be a knowledge collector. Reading stretches your mental template for learning. So, read this article, think and maybe learn something…
Leaders have to be and they have to do. Let’s assume that if you are reading this article, then you are currently leading or are aspiring to lead to a greater level. Then, let’s ask a question and see where it takes us.
What must leaders do?
#1 – Leaders Set Direction. People everywhere at all times need direction. This means they need directors. Leaders are Directors. Leaders are directors not collectors. If you think you are a leader, but aren’t directing anything, then you aren’t really leading–you are occupying a position and have probably become a roadblock for your team. A good directo
r knows the team, the players, the landscape, the obstacles, the goals and the vision of a future outcome before communication begins to happen. A good leader must first understand where the organization or team is going and then how to get the team moving in the right direction. Here’s the bottom line: Someone has to lead, because someone will always lead. In your organization a leadership position does not guarantee that you will ultimately be the one that is the director. The director must be a highly effective communicator. I have taken to teaching my millennial leaders how to be more effective in communicating, because they will become more effective at directing. The breakdown most often is not in the desire, but in the directing. Bad directors, get bad results.
Learning: Better Communicating creates Better Directing.
#2 – Leaders Set the Tone. Once the direction has been set and the directions given, the morale and the environment can still not be productive or effective. In fact, a leader can be great at giving directions, but terrible at getting anyone to follow them. This is because, leaders must also set the tone. What is the tone? The tone is the temperature or the climate in which the team will be operating in. Tone is critical in the construction of chemistry. If a team is struggling with chemistry, chances are the tone has not been set well by the leader or someone else beside the leader is creating the tone. It is critical that leaders understand that they must set the tone. If a leader is always too busy, too rushed to take time for questions or explanation, then they are setting a tone that will result in a coldness or corner-cutting environment. The tone is also set in work ethic and upholding the standards. If the leader cuts corners, takes perks and slacks off because of their position, then they are setting a poor tone. Leaders must hold themselves to a higher standard.
Smoking in the Office
I was discussing this point with some of my learning leaders and one of them shared the example about a factory where smoking was forbidden. In fact, the manager ensured that no one smoked on the production floor, in the break room, outside or even the bathroom. However, when the manager would return to his office that overlooked the factory floor, he would close his door and smoke in the office. As a result, the manager always smelled like smoke. Soon, the workers realized that the manager didn’t hold to the standards himself and neither should they. The manager set the tone with his actions, not his words.
Learning: Don’t Smoke in the Office (Leaders must hold themselves to a higher standard)
#3 – Leaders Control Emotion. If you work with millennials or are a millennial, then this is one you really need to pay attention to. We need to review emotions for a minute: not everything you feel is the correct feeling at the appropriate time. Feelings or emotions are triggered by different stimuli. These stimuli can be both internal and external. Before you express how you feel, the effective leader needs to work through what caused the specific emotion to arise.
If you don’t have all the facts, your feelings can betray you, mislead you or delude you. It is important to acknowledge your emotions, but not be controlled by them. Expressing emotion can be fine, if it is done in a healthy and controlled fashion. But, demonstrating too much of an emotion or the wrong emotion in front of your team or others can neutralize your effectiveness as a leader. This can also cause you to lose credibility. You can be angry, but getting angry at people you are working with doesn’t really help the situation. Learning leaders must separate their emotion from the decision. Don’t make decisions when you are highly emotional. Get control of your emotions before you make decisions. I have learned not to correct or discipline a team member until I have a firm control of my emotions and then conducted an investigation. Don’t give a raise or a promotion, because you are excessively happy. Just as you don’t fire someone because what they have done or you perceive they have done makes you angry.
Emotions can cloud judgment. I’m not saying that you need to deny your emotions (that’s unhealthy), but you do not to get control of your emotions. A wise leader learns (a) to master his/her own emotions, (b) how to read correctly the emotio
ns of those they are leading, and (c) then effectively utilize emotions to inspire and encourage.
Emotional Intelligence
Leaders must also learn to read correctly the emotions of others. A wrong reading or misreading of another’s emotions can add further fuel to a fire you are trying to put out. This is called emotional intelligence. Emotional Intelligence has never been more essential for leaders than it is in today’s super sensitive environment. Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage the emotions of yourself and others (Psychology Today). There are three basic skills in EI (1) the awareness of your emotions and the emotions of others, (2) the ability to harness your emotions and apply them into critical thinking and problem solving, and (3) the ability to regulate or manage your emotions and influence the emotions of others.
Your emotions need to be the wake, not the wind. The wake follows behind the wind. When your emotions become the wind, you often lose control of your boat and capsize. Keep your emotions as the wake, not the wind.
Learning: Don’t be controlled by your emotions, rather control your emotions.
#4 – Leaders Set & Restore Order. Order is critical in every organization. Leaders who don’t maintain order aren’t leading. Very often the leader’s role is to restore order. Every organization and every team is full of individuals and variables. Harmony is born through order. Organizations are more effective when they are most harmonious. Leaders are responsible for this harmony. Part of this harmony is revealed when the leader sets the tone, but the fullness of harmony is when the leader has helped everyone discover and maximize the role needed. This creates fluidity and synchronicity in the organization or team that plays like beautiful music.
Leaders are conductors. It is the leaders job to establish what a clear picture of order should look like and move the organization to that. The leader cannot take a break for this role, because things left alone tend to decay or rot. This is why the leader must be a vigilant conductor. The leader must be more conductor than inspector. Inspectors only identify the problems of disorder, but conductors set and restore order. Order is established through a devotion to the standards.
Learning: Order is not set or restored because a leader shows up. Order takes intentional planning, preparation and a devotion to the standards.
Summary – What Leaders Do
1- Leaders Set Direction
2- Leaders Set Tone
3- Leaders Control Emotion
4- Leaders Set & Restore Order
The world needs better leaders. Your world needs better leadership. It starts with you and it started without you. So, jump in and see what difference you can make. Leadership always makes a difference.
(c) Redwall Leadership Academy. Redwall, LLC (2016)
Jesus: Too Well-Kept a Secret
Too many of those that claim Christ treat him like a well-kept secret. I call this kind of Christian a secret Christian. They are like a spy for Jesus. Except Jesus didn’t send out any of his people as spies. He sent his people out as messengers and story tellers. Proclaiming the message of Jesus is simply retelling what we have already heard. This is what the Apostle John wrote about,
“That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we looked upon and have touched with our hands, concerning the word of life— the life was made manifest, and we have seen it, and testify to it and proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and was made manifest to us— that which we have seen and heard we proclaim also to you, so that you too may have fellowship with us; and indeed our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son Jesus Christ.” [1 John 1:1-3]
Did you see it? It’s hard to share about something you haven’t witnessed, haven’t seen or haven’t heard about. But, if you have heard the story and you know the story, then you can share the story.
A friend who tells your stories
For example, I have a friend that loves to hear my stories. We’ve spent a lot of time together over the years and he has heard my repertoire of stories a lot. In fact, once when I wasn’t around, he was on a trip and told me that the other people on the trip were kind of boring and conversation wasn’t going so well. So, he decided he needed to share my stories and he said they loved them.
Christians must be friends of Jesus, who know his story and will gladly retell his story.
But, sometimes the story, the narrative is a little too heavy for our tastes or the tastes of the audience. We are tempted to give them a “lite” version.
Is there a “lite” version of Christianity?
Lite food and beverages mean less or lower calories. Christians today are seeking a less heavy form of Christianity. The want all the pleasure of Christ, but without all the cost of Christ. They want to be his friend, but with very little work, effort or sacrifice.
After this Jesus went about in Galilee. He would not go about in Judea, because the Jewsa were seeking to kill him. Now the Jews’ Feast of Booths was at hand. So his brothers said to him, “Leave here and go to Judea, that your disciples also may see the works you are doing. For no one works in secret if he seeks to be known openly. If you do these things, show yourself to the world.” For not even his brothers believed in him. Jesus said to them, “My time has not yet come, but your time is always here. [John 7:1-6]
“For no one works in secret if he seeks to be known openly,” said Jesus’ brothers. By the way, these half-brothers were certainly James and Jude (authors of books of the New Testament). Jesus’ brothers were skeptics and probably antagonistic toward their older, gentler and, oh by the way, perfect older brother. Can you imagine living as Jesus’s brother? Some of us had older siblings (six kids in my family) who our parents acted like they were perfect (thankfully in my case this wasn’t the case), in James and Jude’a case these was actually true. Can you imagine Mary, their mother saying, why can’t you be more like your older brother?!
What Jesus’s Brothers Got Right
But, his brothers actually got this one thing right “For no one works in secret if he seeks to be openly known.” Jesus didn’t correct them, because they were right. But, they were wrong about his timing. He responds, “My time has not yet come…” He didn’t refute what was true. It’s true if you want to be known, then you don’t work in secret. If you want something to be known, then you’ve got to work openly, transparently and boldly. This is why church finances, marriages, relationships, businesses, organizations, teams and projects fail: they are conducted in secret.
To be known means to apprehend or understand with clarity and certainty. The brothers of Jesus didn’t know Jesus yet as he truly was–Lord of heaven and earth, the Lamb that takes away the sin of the world, etc. There time of understanding had not yet happened. Jesus was certain or clear to them yet. They were confused about who their half-brother really was, but they wouldn’t always be. James would become known as “camel-knees” because, tradition has it, he prayed so much and so fervently that his knees grew callouses like a camel. James and Jude would become leaders in the Church of Jesus Christ, but not yet. They had to move from unknowing to knowing.
Jesus wants to be known by his followers and made known by his followers. To know something is to grasp it, to understand it and to be fully aware of it. Sadly, this does not describe Jesus’s brothers or many of Jesus’s followers today. That’s why he tells them, “…but your time is always here.” Your time to believe, your time to understand and your time to know and make me known is always here is what he is saying. As long as you are breathing, you can know Jesus and make him known. This is our jobs Christians: make him known. He’s not a secret.
The Church of Jesus Christ, more specifically, people that are claiming to be Christians, have the responsibility to work openly to make Jesus known. We have to come out of our shadows and proclaim the story of the only One that can save men’s souls. This is a Christian’s duty, responsibility and it must become his conviction. Christians must work. Yes, work to make him know. Work openly, work publicly and work with conviction.
(c) Alexander F. Vann. 2016
If we don’t teach responsibility, then we are accepting anarchy. We must instill in our children and in ourselves four deeper virtues that will bring harmony to our citizenry and beauty to our humanity.
“…speak evil of no one, avoid quarreling, be gentle, and show perfect courtesy toward all people.“
Titus 3:2
Certain elements that secure a healthy society are not being taught any more in our corporal lexicon of learning. As a result, when immature adults don’t get their way, they need crayons to color, “safe spaces” to process and outlets that involve destroying other people’s property. They chant curses, burn flags and are “too stressed” to attend a class. They have rejected all sense of responsibility in favor of a riot. Instead of being rebuked and chastened, they are encouraged to “express” themselves. I’m sorry, when I was a kid and I expressed myself in a way that destroyed someone else’s property or cursed someone else, I got swift and painful lesson in correction.
“The time is always right to do what is right” ~ Martin Luther King
Rejection of Responsibility. Parents, you must teach your children to be responsible. What we are seeing in our culture as a result of one group not getting their way, is a giant, collective temper tantrum. Parents, you must act responsibly and make your children act responsibly.
The “progressive” element of our society has rejected virtue in favor of violence, rejected courtesy in favor of cursing, rejected civility in favor of swearing and rejected responsibility in favor of rioting. There are four elements that parents must teach their children immediately to avoid another generation who can’t handle adversity or not getting their way: Courtesy, Civility, Reality & Responsibility.
The Four Virtues of Reasonable Citizenry
Courtesy – is the a general kindness with an accompanying set of manners from one person to another. Common courtesy are the set of manners that are generally acknowledge as polite and respectful towards others. Courtesy is not a demanded virtue, but rather a freely given virtue. Our children need to be taught to be courteous instead of cursing.
Courtesy is the true vestige of nobility. To show courtesy is to live humbly. Courtesy is a rejection of self and an invitation to others. To be courteous is to make the world a better place, a more agreeable place in which we find inhabitation more amiable. Courtesy without provocation turns the table on hostility.
“If a man be gracious and courteous to strangers, it shows he is a citizen of the world.” ~Francis Bacon
Civility – means formal politeness with elevated courtesy. I grew up and live in the South. We still say “Yes Ma’am” and “No Ma’am,” we hold the door for ladies and let cars go in front of us in traffic. Do you know that having a young man hold the door for a young lady is a sign of respect and courtesy? Of course she can open her own door! Civility has to do with formality. Formality is a code of manners and actions that demonstrate honor and respect to others. Civility is different than courtesy in that the onus of civility means you may not agree, but you do respect the position of another. Civility restrains the worst of humanity and promotes the best in humanity.
Kids need to learn these things! Teach your children to push their chairs in, to thank their host, and to eat food that someone serves them even if they don’t like it. Teach your children when they go to a restaurant to eat with a napkin in their lap. We are raising young men and young women, not barbarians. Teach your children to respectfully disagree. We aren’t raising robots or puppies, who must follow every order or command. We are training children to become mature adults. Mature adults should know some common courtesy. Sadly, our culture is being stripped of its formality and becoming very casual. Formality is good because it reinforces value and worth.
Your children will disagree with others. However, they need to be trained to disagree with civility. Civility is a controlled respect for others. Our nation just had an election with the electorate falling on extreme opposite sides. However, we must demonstrate a civility to others that we don’t agree with. Civility speaks of a desire to do no harm and respectfully disagree with an amiable dialogue. The best way to teach civility is to train your children to be consistent in their manners and to model the behavior yourself. You are your children’s greatest model. You are training your children towards incivility when you do the following: curse another driver that pulls in front of you, gossip on your cellphone or become demanding & act rude in public.
Civility means you can respectfully and politely disagree and not become enraged or enflamed with emotion.
Reality – means the state in which things actually exist. What this really means is accepting reality. You can’t change your reality until you accept that things are the way they actually are. Reality TV is not reality. TV is not where you learn your reality. The Internet is not where you learn reality. Your friends social media post is not reality. The greatest picture of reality is found in the Bible. Without a proper understanding of the Bible, the world will quickly become a confused and chaotic place.
Parents need to live in reality the Bible reveals first. Then they must apply this reality to themselves and then teach their children to live in this reality. Too many parents are living for a fantasy or in a fantasy. Fantasy is the state in which things don’t actually exist. The fastest way to live in fantasy is to live in denial. Parents must teach their children to investigate, study and to think for themselves. Most people make mistakes when they rush to judgment.
Reality is about perspective. This is why the Bible is so important. The Bible is your perspective compass. The Bible correctly calibrates your reality compass. Without the Bible, your true north will appear to be true north, but in truth your compass will be misaligned or spin widely out of control. Even a minuscule variation with your compass, over time, will keep you from your destination. Your reality is born out of your perspective. But, this doesn’t make you the authority on the way things really are. Now, with your children you are the authority. Stop letting your children create their own reality. When someone creates their own reality, they are living in a fantasy. You must bring your perspective to your children and your children into your perspective. A perspective without the Bible is an automobile without wheels, a ship without a rudder and a kite without a string.
The Bible is the key to understanding the state in which things really exist.
Responsibility – means that you are accountable for something. Progressives in our culture are teaching that we are to give our responsibility away and someone else can manage it for us. This only weakens our society. Parents, teach your children to be responsible. Responsible for their words, their deeds and their actions.
Every action has a reaction. Every a reaction has a responsibility. The best way for parents to teach responsibility is to hold their children accountable. Give your children things that they can control, teach them how to control those things and then hold them accountable to the standards you’ve taught them. Standards set the responsibility. The Bible is where we discover and learn God’s standards for living. This is why the progressives reject the Bible, they don’t like, want or agree with God’s standards. However, God will hold all of us accountable to his standards.
Let us then, with good intentions and great effort, set ourselves to learning and applying the standards God has set forth for men and women to live with. Let us apply them first to ourselves, our children and then to our government. Whereby, God honors and blesses his standards. May God honor and bless our adherence to his standards.
Anger is like trash. Everybody has it. Some have more, some have less. Some know what to do with it. Some don’t. But, it’s stinking up your home and your kids are starting to play with it. Time to take the trash out!
Building a happy and healthy home has everything to do with controlling your anger.
Parents who don’t to control their anger create children who can’t control their anger.
Control Your Anger
If you want to do your children, your home and our society a favor, then learn how to control your anger. Healthy and happy homes have parents who have learned to control their anger. This scenario is real and it’s played out very often in many many homes across America. Mom or dad has a bad day at the office, gets bad news or is disappointed, then comes home and takes it out on everyone at home. For some reason they can be controlled in a public environment, but in their home they become unglued and their anger is like a flameflower leaving charge remains of everything it touches. Even worse, mom and dad can no longer contain their anger over something like a baseball game or a soccer game and they inject their explosion in full view of everyone to the shame and embarrassment of their family.
Parents, control your anger. The Bible says, “A fool gives full vent to his anger (rage), but a wise man quietly holds it back” (Proverbs 29:11). Parents, you become fool when you can’t control your anger. You are dragging your family into awkward situations, shame and embarrassment. If your children don’t become like you and your anger, then they will get away from you when they have a chance. Anger changes the communication dynamic. Your children as they grow will not be open and transparent with you, because your they are afraid of your reaction. Your children should be able to anticipate your reaction, but you need to create a climate in your home of openness and transparency. Anger is a repellent. It stinks. The one exercising it, doesn’t smell it, but everyone around you does.
Two Types of Anger: Controlled & Uncontrolled
The Bible is clear, “Be angry and sin not” (Ephesians 4:26). There is a type of controlled anger that does not lead you to sin. This is an anger that is under control with a flame that is quickly extinguished if it flares up when it should not. Make no mistake, there are things that should make us angry. If someone injures a child, someone who steals or someone who spreads lies and rumors, and things that are immoral or unrighteous, then these things should make us angry. Even then there must be a control or a governor on our anger. You are an imperfect person living with billions of other imperfect people, but as a parent you are living among highly impressionable little people – – your children. The most impressionable group of people on the planet are your children.
Your uncontrolled anger leaves a deep impression upon your children. But, it is the wrong kind of impression. It’s a depression that becomes a scar, a wound or a bent that creates a weakness in their life. One of my heroes, Dr. Johnny Hunt says, “What you do in moderation, your children will do in excess.” This certainly applies to anger. A little uncontrolled anger in a parent, can become a lot of uncontrolled anger in a child. Uncontrolled anger is rage. Rage clouds your vision, limits your understanding and escalates your actions.
Anger is either controlled or uncontrolled. Many people believe that they don’t have an anger problem because they don’t express their themselves or their anger through rage or explosive outbursts. However, these individuals often struggle with the more duplicitous and diabolical form of anger called bitterness. Bitterness is a poison. It rots the soul of the one who is angry. But bitterness is an anger that never keeps to itself–it always spreads. Bitterness is a toxin. It spreads quietly, but deadly through your life and into the lives of those around you.
Anger is a Choice
No one makes you angry, you chose to get angry. Stop saying, “You make me so angry “or “That made me angry!” Nope, you chose to be angry. You could have chose to remain calm. But you allowed yourself to escalate your feelings. What this means is that you were actually choosing to be angry and choosing to stay angry. This choice will have devastating consequences both to you and to those around you if you choose to remain angry. Blaming someone else is excusing your own inability to control your anger. Do not create this in your children by telling them that you that they make you angry. Stop blaming people, situations, circumstances and your past for your anger. First, you must take responsibility for your anger and the consequences of your anger.
Don’t Use Anger to Tip The Scales In Your Favor
Don’t discipline when you are angry. Don’t punish when you are angry. Don’t respond when you’re angry. Give yourself a time out if you are angry. Anger doesn’t solve problems, it creates bigger problems. Anger clouds the vision of the one that is angry and puts the other person or people on the defensive. Too many parents use their anger to “tip the scales” in their favor. We learn as parents that sometimes that we can get results if we get angry with our kids. Don’t yell. Don’t get angry. Get serious. Stay calm and follow through on your word. Don’t make threats. Threats are just fuel on your fire of anger. Threats lead to an explosion. Simply give your children instructions. If they don’t follow through on the instructions, then get up and go see why they didn’t follow them. Yelling doesn’t solve problems. Yelling is a short-cut in communication and it creates instability in the home. When you get angry to get your way, you are inadvertently teaching you children that the solution to some problems is to get angry. You are teaching them to use anger to solve their problems and control people with anger.
The Results of Uncontrolled Anger: Explosion or Implosion
Uncontrolled anger does two things: explosion or implosion. Everyone is familiar with the explosion. Explosions come from rage and outbursts. It is when anger builds up over a period of time or escalates quickly and explosion happens. Explosions create great instability and an facilitate an unhealthy home. The other outcome of anger is implosion. Implosion happens through bitterness. Bitterness is passive anger, where rage is active anger. A bitter person is actually exploding on the inside, but has come to the realization that they can’t or won’t explode on the outside. These internal explosions or implosions are like cave-ins. Cave-ins block you up on the inside. They block of your thoughts towards others and they block up your communication with others. Neither rage or bitterness are helpful to building a healthy and happy home.
The Keys to Overcoming Anger: Forgiveness & Self-Control
For many people the key to overcoming anger comes through forgiveness. Forgiveness is not forgetting that things have happened, but rather releasing the one or the thing that is causing you injury. You can’t do mind wipe, so don’t try. But, try to see things in a new light. As a Christian, this new light comes through Jesus Christ. Just as he chose to forgive me, I must chose to forgive others. Forgiveness means release. In order to overcome anger, to not be a prisoner of anger and hold others hostage by your anger, you must learn to release your feelings of frustration, disappointment, loss of control, failure or embarrassment that are pouring fuel on our pride. When our pride gets injured we get angry. Learn to release things and people. Self-control is when you take responsibility over your feelings and emotions and apply that control to the decisions you make, the words you say and the actions you take.
Forgiveness and self-control help your internal thermostat. These qualities help regulate bring you back to “room temperature.” When you can stay at room temperature, you can see things more clearly, you can control your feelings and read others feelings better. Bitterness is an icebox. Rage is a sauna. Happy Homes are neither iceboxes or saunas. They are homes, where parents and children live at room temperature.
Anger is like trash. Don’t forget to take it out.
It’s stinking your house up, get rid of it. Everyone likes living in a clean house.
“Without fuel, the fire goes out“
Proverbs 26:20
The strength of a leader is found in the strength of the followers.
You are not a leader unless you have followers.
You are not a great leader unless you have great followers. Greatness is defined by quality, not quantity. Jesus started with 12. Great leaders should look to develop a small, tight circle of outstanding followers, before they look to grow a large organization.
If you look around and you are thinking that you are leader and there is no one following you, then you have a problem. Your problem might be that you are not a leader. Pure and simple, leaders have followers. So, if you think you are a leader and no one is following you, then you are a lone wolf. The lone wolf hunts alone, eats alone, howls alone and dies alone. There is no such thing as a lone wolf leader. A lone wolf who thinks they are a leader, might have a leadership position, but this doesn’t mean that they have any followers. A lone wolf leader is really like an independent contractor. They work for themselves, task people for their benefit and at the end of the day will be surrounded by no one. They are loyal to themselves and subsequently don’t receive the loyalty of those around them. Wolves are effective when they hunt in a pack, eat as pack, howl as a pack and stay in the pack. They control more territory, eat better meals and produce more wolves. But, there is always a leader (the alpha) in a wolf pack. Every wolf must learn their role and fit in that role or be expelled from the pack. Wolves without packs are in a precarious position. Leaders without followers are in a precarious position. 
Great leaders have great followers. Followers are real people. This is important. Leaders must assess if the people around them are truly following them in reality, not just in fantasy. Jimmy Collins, retired Chick-fil-A President, makes a distinction between followers (those following a leader) and workers (those occupying positions and doing tasks). Many leaders have deceived themselves thinking that the people around them are following them, when in reality, they were not.
~Leaders must capture the heart of their followers. This is where inspiration takes place. People want to be inspired. A follower is inspired, a worker is not. The quickest way to move someone who is only a worker to a follower is to inspire them. A worker is just filling time and space by performing a task or duty solely for a personal benefit. The only way to capture a heart is to first connect with the heart. You can appeal to someone’s mind or their wallet and never connect with their heart. The leader must demonstrate genuine care and concern for the individual for any chance of a true connection to happen. Followers willingly surrender their heart to the leader when they are inspired to follow. The surrendered heart is, well and truly, the only captured heart. Any other type of capturing of the heart is just holding someone’s heart hostage through manipulation or coercion.
How to Apply: A good way to apply this is to have a one-on-one meeting with the follower. A leader who can cast a vision that is embraced by the follower has the opportunity to capture the heart. A leader that can open his/her heart and have a worker open their heart and share is close to winning the heart. If you can relate a message to your follower and the follower believes the message and then shares the message with others, then a heart has been won. A good test of this is in the request. What can the leader request of the follower without asking, “Have I won your heart?” (that would be entirely awkward, don’t do that). It’s simple, can you stay a few minutes longer today? Can you come in early? Can you help me with a special project? You are asking if they can do more. If the request is greeted with immediate embrace, enthusiasm or energy, then you have probably won the heart. A captured heart can become a loyal heart…
~Leaders must win the loyalty of their followers. Loyalty is a freely given commitment of allegiance from follower to leader. But, this commitment always starts with the leader. Leaders must first give their loyalty to those who they desire to follow them. Leaders must always demonstrate allegiance to those they wish to follow. When leaders take this loyalty for granted in their followers, they weaken the heart bond and create and environment of mistrust and suspicion. A leader must express clear motivation when making decisions that affect those that are following. Without expressing motivation, erosion of trust has the potential to develop. A leader to maintain loyalty must guard trust at all costs. Trust is guarded and solidified by transparency. Transparency on the part of the leader and on the part of the followers. Tenure is not a test of loyalty. Be careful, just because someone has been around for a long time, doesn’t mean you’ve won their loyalty. Money creates a false sense of loyalty. Leaders have to be careful to test if the loyalty is to the money or to the leader.
How to Apply: The test of loyalty comes in the response. Workers respond slowly, methodically and selfishly. Followers respond quickly, passionately and selflessly. A good practice for leaders is to ask challenging, difficult or new things of those working for them, then, measure the response. Good workers will still get the job done, but their response is a pained response, a slow response or a bothered response. Workers respond to be left alone. A good follower will respond to this new challenge with enthusiasm. A good follower embraces the leaders directions or directives. Followers respond to please. 
~Leaders must earn the respect of their followers. Transparency earns respect. Respect has to be earned. Respect cannot be demanded. Demanded respect is the basis of tyranny. Tyrants in the work place are bossy, self-centered and egotistical. Leaders must truly serve their organization and serve the followers of their organization. This means they work hard to not only initially earn their followers’ respect, but always work to maintain the respect of their followers. This means the leader’s actions, conduct, speech and behavior must be above and beyond reproach.
How to Apply: A good practice for leaders is to publicly honor their followers as much as possible in ways that are authentic and meaningful. Another good practice for a leader is to not demand the spotlight or demand elevated status in the organization, but share the spotlight and elevate others as much as possible. A good practice for leaders is to be the example. This means first modeling the behavior for your followers. Instead of saying, “Go do this or let me see that.” Leaders say, “Let me show you how or I will demonstrate for you.” A poor work ethic, sloppy performance or distracted attention will cause respect to erode from your followers. Remember names, details, families, and personal interests of those that follow you. This generates much respect. Followers expect leaders to be different than them. I personally try to remember names of people and things about people after just one meeting. I try to give my full and immediate attention when I am in a one-on-one setting. This means I must give my undivided attention to the person and then actually think about them and what we talked about. Also, I try to speak to each of my followers as much as possible making a joke, using self-deprecation or praising the work that is done. Knowing personal life details about your followers is a quick way to earn respect, loyalty and their heart.
It’s not the quantity of followers that makes you great leader, it is in the quality of the followers you have that determines the greatness of your leading. Great leaders have great followers. Every great leader is a great follower, but every great follower isn’t a great leader.
“Come follow Me“
Jesus
(Mark 1:17)
(c) 2016. Redwall Leadership Academy.
What is culture?
Peter Drucker famously said, “Culture eats strategy for breakfast.”
We can acknowledge that culture is more important than strategy. Instead of spending more investment on strategy, spend more time on building culture. Culture is centered around one thing and one thing alone: people.
But, that still doesn’t explain what culture is…
Simply stated, it’s really hard to define. I have found many definitions that are scholarly and verbose that try to include every static idea in a very fluid and subjective word. Culture can mean different things to different people at different times, but most all readily agree it exists and it is a key component in the success or failure of any organization.
Culture is the collective shared ideas about life that shape and affect behavior.
Culture really is a climate that directs conduct. So if you want to change the conduct then you have to change the culture. But, if it is so hard to define, then certainly it is hard to explain and express. Culture is not based on a feeling, an event or a position. All of those elements may play a key role or become a critical by-product of culture, but culture will always be created, kept and recreated by people. Culture is all about people: what they believe, how they communicate, and how they conduct themselves.
Culture is composed of three major, but simple elements: values, symbols, behaviors.
#1 – Values: What you believe speaks the loudest about who you are.
Every organization needs to identify who they are by identifying what is most important to those who are leading the organization. If the leaders do not identify the core values, then someone else in the organization will. If the leaders don’t believe in what they are proclaiming, then no one else will either. Core values must be believable both to the leaders that preach them and the followers that hear them. Core values must be accepted by all of those in the organization or dysfunction will surely follow.
What is so evident is that when a organization does not clearly define “who they are” the organization develops multiple personality disorder. Competing identities will always weaken or destroy any organization.
Values state to everyone in the organization “this is who we are.” And when a member of the organization knows who they are, they also know who they are not. Core Values need to be simple, identifiable and believable.
Most importantly, your values are your convictions. Convictions give consistency to your identity. Many organizations have failed, because they compromised on convictions. Compromising leads to catastrophe. Better to be consistent over a long period of time with short growth, than inconsistent over a short period of time with explosive growth. Consistency produces clarity and sustainability. Many organizations change their core values when they move from private to public, causing a loss of identity.
If you want a stronger culture, clearly identify and articulate your core values.
#2- Symbols: How you communicate is essential to how you will be perceived and received.
Organizational communication is an element that many organizations overlook or minimize the necessity of the role. Symbols are the formation of the language, brands, logos, and stories that an organization passes throughout its framework. Symbols are powerful. Without them, our thoughts would not become words, our plans would not become realities and our dreams would not be possible.
Symbols in an organization communicate simply and powerfully messages. One often overlooked symbol is the story or narrative. The story is an anecdote that serves to carry culture across generations and emphasize a point. Some of the best teachers in the world are the best storytellers. A great story causes the listener to identify and learn through the telling of the story. Stories are one of the most effective ways to pass ideas of importance to new members and new generations of the organizations. All members of the organization should be able to tell key stories or anecdotes about the organization that reinforce the values of the organization.
If you want a stronger culture, become a better story-teller.
#3- Behaviors: What you do is the result of what you believe and how effective your communication is.
What you do is important. Why you do it is more important. You can have the best training system in the world, but if there is not a culture that honors and emphasizes training, then the behavior is not reinforced and culture is lost.
If you want to instill a culture of service, then the leaders of the organization must not only talk about serving, but they must also demonstrate that they also serve. If you want a culture of generosity, then the leaders must model generosity. Modeling is one of the most effective behaviors that communicates and reinforces culture. It is not enough just to identify and tell someone what they must do, they also must see it being done. Too many organizations still practice, “Do what I say, not what I do.” Everything rises and falls on leadership. Leaders must be the supreme examples in the organizations, if not they are creating dysfunction by their own example.
The Question
One question I often ask of those developing in the organization is simply this: “Who are you modeling yourself after?” This is an eye-opener for sure. Sometimes, they don’t even know what this means. Sometimes, they are modeling themselves after the wrong people. There should be a healthy lineage of behavior modeling in the organization. I say healthy, because this exists in any organization. If you have a dishonest leader, then trust me the subordinates to that leader are being taught to be dishonest because of the modeling principle that comes through the concept of behavior.
If you want a stronger culture, then focus on practicing behaviors that reinforce your core values.
People are the key to each of these three culture components. People have values. People see and communicate through symbols. People have behaviors. To create culture you have to construct a healthy lining that begins with your beliefs (values) and extends in how you communicate and the expected conduct that will follow. Without convictions your culture will only be consistent in its inconsistency.
Leaders must identify what they believe, preach it and practice it. If not they have deceived themselves and someone else is creating a culture that is leading the organization.
“Be doers of the word and not hearers only”
James 1:22
Friday Family Tip #1: Do as much as you can together.
This may seem obvious, but in reality moms and dads often lead very separated and isolated lives trading children for which ever spouse it’s more convenient. This is a recipe for rebellious children, a fractured family and ultimately, a divorce.
This kind of dual-living really speaks to the properties of the parents and quality of their marriage, which is the core of the family structure and health. Healthy marriages facilitate healthy families. Wake up, if your marriage is in trouble, your family is in trouble. Wake up if your priorities center around you, your family is in trouble. Families that have shared priorities are happier, healthier and work together better as a whole. Families that have competing priorities are associates not friends, escalate into hostility quickly and are generally looking for substitutionary means of happiness that come from outside the family (the root of many affairs).
Together means “with, at the same time, without interruption.” So, families that do things with each other, at the same time, without interruption are doing things together. Together means “not apart.” Together means unity and wholeness. Families must discipline themselves to work together, play together, eat together, disagree together and be together. This can be hard for some families (certainly, there are times that work/vocation make this impossible), but it is really about melding an attitude, a spirit and a heart of family unity that is an indivisible and indefatigable bond.
“There is no doubt that it is around the family and the home that all the greatest virtues, the most dominating virtues of human society, are created, strengthened and maintained.”
Winston Churchill
Happy families have strong bonds. This idea of bonding is critical for your family’s health and happiness. Bonds are formed and strengthened as your family spends time together. When parts of the family are missing, they are missing out on strengthening the bond. Bonds are born by time spent by doing things close together. Some of my most poignant memories of my childhood became bonds of suffering as I and my five siblings went everywhere together in our 1979 Chevrolet Impala station wagon with no air conditioning and half the windows that didn’t work. Environments, activities and situations create unbreakable bonds between children and parents.
We live in a generation that’s all about “me.” That can be me the kids or me the parents. Part of the role of a family is to teach everyone about commitment, cost and sacrifice. My parents didn’t cater to their six children, nor did they make us cater to them. There were family priorities that affected everyone in to family that helped determine what we did as a family.
Parents take your kids with you wherever you go, whenever you go as often as you can as an ENTIRE FAMILY. Don’t fragment your family unless you have to. Fragmentation is a structure that has developed into pieces or parts. The healthy family functions as a whole, single unit.This creates a system of support. So, when the members of the family have problems (and trust me you all will), they can turn to their immediate and closest support system–their family.
Create and schedule intentional whole family activities where all parents and all children are engaged. Parents, this means NO CELL PHONES. Family activities are the most influential and memorable when mom and dad are fully present and attentive. Play a board game, eat meals at a table, watch a movie (on Clearplay or VidAngel), go to the park, go for a walk, go to the grocery store and attend church together. Being present and attentive signifies a healthy family support system.
Keep your children as close to your wings as possible for as long as possible. Don’t push them out of the nest to figure out how to fly on their own. Put them on your back and jump out of nest with them, as a family. This will keep them coming back to the nest as a place of safety, security and happiness.
Selfish parents seek to do lots of “things” by themselves apart from their kids. Keep your kids close, change your lifestyle to benefit your children, not your children to benefit yours.
Principle #1 is about sharing and doing life together. Otherwise, when they are grown, they will not want to share their life with you. You have a short window of opportunity to really enjoy your kids when they are young, otherwise they will not enjoy your company when they are old.
Leadership seems to be lost these days. What should we be looking for in our leaders?
There is not much debate around leadership anymore. The fact is widely acknowledged that leadership is at an all-time low, despite having more written about it in the past 30 years than all the millennia of human history combined. If there was a hall of fame for worst leaders, then we’d certainly have some prime candidates as we begin the 21st Century. Somewhere along the way, our leaders have lost their way. Followers stopped holding their leaders accountable and our culture is not better for it.
There are still great leaders out there, but sadly many of them are not running for public office, being promoted as generals (we do still have some great generals) or sitting in positions of national influence. If you’ve ever been led by a great leader, then you know that everything rises and falls on leadership.
6 Things that are Essential to Excellent Leaders
1- Credible & Believable. If a leader is not credible, then they are unbelievable! Literally, if you are trying to convince yourself that the leader in question is trustworthy, then that leader has already been discredited in your mind. Rhetoric is the art of popular and persuasive speech. As a discerning follower, you must get beyond a leader’s rhetoric and assess their motivation. True inspiration does not come from solely passionate and persuasive speech. True inspiration comes from your assessment of credibility of the speaker’s motivation. Credibility is always born out of substance. Beware of leaders who peddle promises without substance. Anyone call tell you what you want to hear, very few will tell you what you need to hear–it’s the credible leader that will do the latter.
The ancient Greeks called this credibility a speaker’s ethos or spirit. You must ask yourself, “Does my spirit really connect, identify or testify to their spirit?” Each person has intuition until they quit using it or allow someone to numb it. When you evaluate a leader as credible, you have judged them believable.
If people don’t believe you, then ultimately they won’t follow you. So, either you have to bribe them, brainwash them or bash them to get them to follow you. This is what poor leaders do. Great leaders steer far away from this pattern of behavior. Poor leaders are always fearful of losing control, so they go to great lengths to protect their ability to control their followers. Great leaders are believed and beloved by their followers and they are willingly followed.
2- Track Record of Being Right and Getting it Right. There are no perfect leaders presently inhabiting the earth. There are good & effective leaders and there are poor & ineffective leaders. The question is not if they make mistakes, but rather, how they respond to their mistakes. I always teach that some mistakes are healthy (just not the lawsuit kind, the kind that cost a lot of money or the kind that loose your life). However, an assessment of leadership is to ask “Has this person learned from their mistakes?”
Leaders don’t always come out and say, “Yesterday I made a mistake, today I will correct it.” That would be nice, but maybe a little naive. However, does the leader at some point own up to the error and make the needed adjustments and corrections? Especially, as they progress, do they stop making that error.
3- Willing to Take a an Unpopular Position based on Convictions. Leaders with conviction have friends with convictions. You want to see the measure of a leader: look at the convictions of their friends. Convictions are deeply held beliefs that identify character and determine direction. Convictionless people are stringless balloons–they float whichever way the wind blows them.
Great leaders work hard to avoid the popularity contest. Great leaders take a position and hold it. The effective leaders take a stand for what is right, not what is popular. Because true convictions are based on absolute, moral law, then the great leader will stand firm, despite popular opinion and pundits turning against him/her.
Convictions breed consistency. Great leaders are highly consistent people. Why? Because they are not trying to figure out what people want and then give it to them. They have a message to proclaim and allow people to see the consistency, transparency and candor that their personal convictions illicit in the life of that leader. Many of our leaders today, not only can’t pick a position, they won’t pick a position. Moreover, because moral law has been disregarded in the court of public opinion, they take the popular position.
One of my favorite proverbs is a statement Jesus said, “Wisdom is proved right by her children.” Every leader has a track record. Examine the track record. Wisdom and right decisions are always linked. A wise leader more often than not gets it right–whatever it is! (Just for the record Jesus never got it wrong). Always look at a leader’s “children” or what or whom they are producing. Good trees bear good fruit. Bad trees bear bad fruit or no fruit.
4- Understands and Applies Honor. Honor is a term that we rarely use anymore. We used to see our country as a place worthy of honor. We have holidays to honor those who have sacrificed and shed blood. Honor is a good thing. To honor someone or something is to esteem that thing above others. Historically, our nation has honored the brave, the selfless and those that have paid the highest sacrifice.
Leaders that understand honor, have the habit of giving it and showering it on those around them. Poor leaders, selfish leaders gravitate towards honoring themselves. These are self-centered, ego-driven leaders who are more about manipulating those that follow them and rewarding those who ensure their continued power. This is because they don’t like to share honor. Watch who leaders place around them “on stage.” Do they place self-less people or self-centered people? Do they put forth honorable people or dishonorable people?
Early Christians were commanded by the Apostle Paul to “outdo one another is showing honor” (Romans 12:10). To show honor demonstrates a reverence, a respect and a sacredness that is rapidly departing from our nation and our culture. Without honor a nation, a people will decay. Dishonor decays a nation. Demanded honor breeds tyranny.
5- True to their Word. Leaders who can’t keep their word, really can’t be trusted. Truth is not expedient for a leader. Truth is a non-negotiable for a leader. Sadly, our culture not only allows dishonest leaders, but whole-heartedly embraces them.
My father taught me to keep my word, despite what it cost me. Many games or fun things I missed because I had a prior commitment. Followers need to demand that leaders commit. A committed leader is a leader that is dedicated to the cause, the organization and the mission. A person’s word used to be their bond. A bond is a seal and a restriction. This bond of trust seals in the mission and restricts the distraction. A leader that keeps his/her word is a leader that is demonstrating that they are both responsible and can be trusted. A leader that can’t keep their word is demonstrating that are irresponsible, looking for convenience and untrustworthy.
Trust is glue. Glue is what bonds things together. Trust is the bond that unites leaders and followers together.
“Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word. Never get too big for your britches. Trust in God. Have no fear; and Never forget a friend.”
~Harry S. Truman
Leaders who get “too big for their britches” are arrogant leaders. Arrogance is blindness. Blindness leads people into ditches, snares and pits. Humility keeps a leader in the right-fitting pair britches. Humility makes a good mirror. Pride is a foggy mirror.
6- Trusts in God. There is no greater thing a leader can do than to put his/her trust in the Almighty Creator. When a leader recognizes that they too are under the authority of God, then a level and measure of humility enter in to that leader’s life that will affect their entire organization and sphere of influence. Leaders that recognize that God is supreme and has given man absolute, moral law truly begin to understand justice, judgment and mercy. Our nation’s greatest leaders were unashamed to evoke God’s blessing and publicly express their belief in God and the Bible.
“If we ever forget that we are one nation under God, then we will be one nation gone under.”
~Ronald Reagan
We, as followers, must throw off the shackles of ignorance and passivity and demand that our leaders act like leaders instead of tyrants. Leaders who have credibility, who get their decisions right, have deep-seated convictions, act honorably, keep their word and trust God. We, as followers, must look beyond the popularity contest and the posturing contest to discern what is truly motivating and guiding that leader. Leadership doesn’t have to die with an election. If everything rises and falls on leadership, then let us ask God to raise up leaders who will raise the nation, the culture, the community and the home back up.
“Without God there could be no American form of government, nor an American way of life. Recognition of the Supreme Being is the first, the most basic, expression of Americanism. Thus, the founding fathers of America saw it, and thus with God’s help, it will continue to be.”
– Dwight D. Eisenhower
Do you need help selecting the right people?
Are you struggling to land the best people you can for the best position possible? Are you finding it difficult to determine if a candidate really will work well for you and with you. People selection is one of the most critical and difficult tasks for any leader on any team or in any organization. There is a war for talent and this clouds and confuses the talent selection process because there is more pressure to make the right selection than ever before.
The Challenge
Let’s assume you and your HR team have done your home work and you are looking at multiple candidates that are all qualified. You are debating with your team and with your self about if and who would be the “right” fit for the position. Let’s further assume you’ve hired or promoted some people in the past that either didn’t work or were just complete disasters. This fact is putting extra pressure on you to really get this selection right.
The Chemistry of Selecting People
Selecting people is like chemistry. Electing people is like politics. Both can be explosive. But chemistry is more predictable. Think of your selecting like chemistry. In chemistry, you don’t just pour a bunch of random chemicals into a beaker and hope for the best. If you do that you will create a potential poison gas or an explosion. Rather, you select chemicals that will react well and compliment one another. This is predictable. There is an art and a science to selecting people. Get in your mind that hiring and promoting people is a selection, not an election.
The Tool: Chemistry Checklist
I have developed a quick checklist when I get down to the final decision that will help you decide if the chemistry clicks. When you get down to the end of the process, review these things to make sure you are not going to mess up the chemistry in your organization. It, literally, just takes the wrong element at the wrong time to bring instability and tension to your chemistry. These four elements were actually from a series of conversations that I had with my brother who is a very successful senior manager of a large corporation. He and I are in different organizations, but are really both in the talent acquisition business. Those who excel in talent acquisition are good at people chemistry.
Chemistry that Clicks Checklist:
#1 – Led: (A willing follower) The first thing I am going to examine is whether or not I believe that this candidate has a willingness to be led by me, the immediate supervisor and the organization.
Ask yourself, “Will this person follow me? Does this person have a willingness to be led?”
If a candidate comes in to exert their efficiency, expertise or knowledge, then I can expect chemistry concerns from the very beginning. A person that can be led is potentially a person that can lead. People that don’t follow don’t belong in your organization. Everyone is led by someone. In your final selection process make a determination whether or not you believe this person can be led by you. I’m not suggesting you are looking for unmotivated, uninspired people (that should have already been determined or you shouldn’t be to this point). I’m suggesting you examine the motivations of the candidates ticker. What makes them tick? What drives them?
A person that can be led by you can be fed by you. This is a key component in developing people in your organization.
#2 – Listen: (A good listener) The next element of chemistry I am looking for is to discern how good a listener this candidate is. People who are poor listeners typically are good talkers. Good talkers need to be heard. Beware of a need to be heard. You should have already determined that this person has been able to communicate their ability and you believe them. Ask them questions to asses their ability to listen.
Ask yourself, “Is this person someone I can see really listening to me?”
Good listeners make good learners. It’s impossible to listen if you are distracted or doing all the talking. Beware of people that “don’t come up for air” when they are speaking. Basically, these people have not learned to read the person (in this case you) that they are communicating with. Poor listeners are often poor people readers. Poor listeners often have very poor emotional intelligence. Good chemistry always has a basis of good communication.
#3 – Loyalty: (A strong bonder) The longer I work with people, the more I have learned how valuable and irreplaceable loyalty really is for an organization or a relationship. Loyal people are harder and harder to come by. I think, however, there is some confusion as to what loyalty really is. To be loyal is to be faithful. This is a deeper understanding of loyalty. Loyalty is where integrity meets faithfulness. Faithful people are loyal people.
Ask yourself, “Do I see this candidate as someone who will be loyal to me and my team? Will this person stay on my team or become a team of their own?”
In an age where commitment is at an all time low, uncommitted and unfaithful people mess your chemistry up. Why? Because disloyal people are inconsistent. Inconsistency causes those in the organization or in the team to question both the motivation and the sincerity of the individual. Inconsistency causes instability. Loyal people bring stability to the team. Loyalty is an element in a selection that will actually help bond your relationship, team or organization together. Strong bonds make for strong teams. Loyalty makes good glue in people chemistry.
#4 – Like-ability: (a good friend) This is the simplest one of all the elements. This comes from your heart to their heart. You, as a person, not the boss, not the leader, not the manager, just you, are wondering if you really like this person or not. I have found that if I am going to select people, I don’t want to have to convince myself that I like them. I don’t want to change my own chemistry to get their element to fit with my chemistry. Remember, you are in the position in your team or organization for a reason and you were there first. You are a leader for a reason. Leaders must protect the chemistry. This means, you get the first right of refusal. Sometimes, you just don’t “like” the candidate more than you like the one you just met with. This is fine. Don’t talk yourself into liking a candidate, this almost never works. If something in you doesn’t connect with something in them, then move on because you are in danger of messing up your chemistry.
Ask yourself, “Do I connect this person? Do I like this person? Will I like them more or less in the next couple of months than I do now?”
I write this from more than 20 years experience of selecting people. Sometimes, you can’t explain it. You look at the candidate, you look at their resume and everything looks good, but you just don’t connect with them on any level or more importantly on the deepest levels. Don’t make yourself connect with them. You are a human. Most likely, if you’ve read this far in this article, you work with other humans. Not all humans like each other. Some chemicals react negatively with other chemicals, just like some people react negatively with other people. That’s okay. Don’t bring people into your sphere of influence if the chemistry doesn’t click from the beginning. Remember, in this discussion, they have already been proven to be qualified, so you aren’t trying to make an unqualified person fit into a position they aren’t qualified for.
Here’s why like-abilty is so important to you as the selector: you will be more patient, more forgiving and more understanding of the growth and development or the mistakes of a person that you like than one you don’t like.
To like in chemistry literally means to attract, to draw together or agreeable. It’s like a good meal or a bad meal. A good meal reacts well with your body chemistry and you are relaxed and satisfied. A bad meal reacts poorly with your body chemistry and upsets your stomach.
Conclusion:
Think about your organization, your team as a chemistry lab. You have lots of elements present, but not all of them will mix well together. Your job as the professor in this lab is to match the elements well. When the chemistry in your organization or team is matched well you can expect peace, greater results and greater efficiency.
The right people for you will have a chemistry that meshes well with what is already existing (unless you are trying to change the chemistry, but that will have to be an article for another day!). The right people will be led, will listen, will be loyal and you will like them.
Get the Chemistry Right and You will Start Getting the Right Results!
Chemistry that Clicks Checklist:
1- will be Led – This person is a willing follower
2- will Listen – This person is a good listener
3- will be Loyal – This person is a faithful companion
4- I will Like them – This person is an agreeable friend
(c) 2016. Redwall Leadership Academy